Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
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