Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
