some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
