It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
