shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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