he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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