ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize