A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
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