So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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