i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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