Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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