i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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