If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize