Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
