come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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