This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
