She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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