I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
