She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
3 2 1 whiskey
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
