ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
