Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
