I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
