Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I want her autograph on my taint
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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