One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i just google imaged poop.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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