i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Randomize
