ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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