Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Randomize