Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
