hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize