I smell stomach acid.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
