i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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