Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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