I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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