She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
