woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
