I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
