I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
