But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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