yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Randomize
