okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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