I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Randomize
