I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
