Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
