She is in my trunk
Its about making memories worth repressing
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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