So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize