Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
