ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Randomize
