Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
wow bdsm is so cute
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize