Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
