Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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